But something starts to feel wrong, out of place... but there's no time to stop and think about it, nope there's no time for anything, gotta keep up with the non stop schedule with every minute of free time taken up, gotta maintain that progress in your career to keep growing, gotta balance that out with an exciting social life because without the fun how would you release all that pressure of work? Sleep reduces to only 3 hours a day as that's all that can be squeezed in, I started running on reserve energy that I didn't even know was humanly possible, and life just seems to fly past you at the speed of light......
.... and about a month ago all of the lights, noise and chaos started to blind me from the root of the wrong feeling that kept nagging at me. And when two minutes of golden silence and peace would blessingly enter my life, i thought to myself 'hang on a sec, where AM I going? Which way was I heading in the first place? Why are all these good people leaving my life? Why is all the positivity I am trying to spread around me actually having the adverse effect than I intend it to? What is going ON????
I felt blocked. Obstacles were everywhere. I decided to stop and listen to my body. How can I get rid of these blockages? I asked. I started to have cravings for the rustling trees, mountain views, fresh sea air, and the sound of crashing waves. I could feel the lack of nature around me. I love nature so much so, that when there is a lack of it, I deeply miss its presence. That's when I knew, I needed to get away. A solo adventure to a tropical island for 4 days. Off I went........
I arrived and got on the bus to the hostel from the airport. It was a fairly long journey. I noticed immediately there was nothing to worry about, no timing to be held, no promise or plan to implement, only me and a the swaying of palm trees slowly passing me by. My mind quickly emptied, and I went into a deep state of contented thought. When I arrived at my destination. I suddenly realized it had been months since I had even had time to think about going into a deep state of contentness like I just did, and I already felt refreshed before the holiday had even started.
As the holiday unfolded everything that I wished for was basically given to me on a silver platter. I wanted to achieve my dream of scuba-diving, and I did so a few hours after getting off the plane. I wanted to visit the jungles and see the old tribal culture that existed there, and so a lady I just met offered to drive me all the way there and back for free. I wanted to meet special and inspiring people that I had connections with and create unforgettable memories with, and I did that too. And even when a typhoon hit the island on the last day, I was forced to stay in the hostel and have a whole day of just relaxing cooking watching movies and playing board games. I forgot how beautiful these days could be.
I spent a whole evening on the beach watching the waves. I thought about my scuba-diving experience. I had never imagined so much beauty existed under the ocean. What was the secret of the ocean? It was free, everything came and everything went with the motion of the waves, it accepted everything, it never held on to anything, it always let everything go. And what was the result? a magical world underneath thriving with beauty and positivity beyond our comprehension.
One month has passed since that much needed and inspirational get away. It slowed my life down in a way that actually saved it from its own downfall. I came back to the city, with my mind unblocked and ready to accept, let go and be free, just like the sea. Within a few weeks, career opportunities started falling into my lap, and the window to my future was suddenly clean enough to look through and have a sneak peak at. It's enough to start my journey again, now I know which direction in which to head to.
As for the unintentionally negative effect I was having before I left the island, I figured out how that was happening and have made my own remedy to the situation. There has been a few situations in my life as of recent that have ended up with me being hurt and a little resentful. I can see clearly now that the key to preventing these situations from continuing was an ultimate forgiveness to everyone I had negative feelings towards in my life. And so I've started something called 'The Book Of Forgiveness'. In this book I've written a small letter to every person I felt has been connected with why I have felt hurt recently, and 100% completely with all my heart forgiven them in these letters.
Now I feel like the sea. No fear, resentment, anger, no boundaries, blockages or obstacles in my destination. Only me and the thousands of possibilities surrounding me now and in my future. And just like the sea, my magical world is appearing before me with beauty too sacred to describe in written word form....
You have the choice now, to cleanse. Get rid of all the pressure and stress, and with an empty mind make the space for the universe to swoop in and answer all of your prayers. Now just like the sea and me, come with me and be free.....
